Scroll down to the word, “Cock”…
10 Nov 2010 7 Comments
in Bedraggled Mum, Parenthood Tags: Mother, School
This morning was one of those parent and teacher bonding sessions where they were showing us how to use the phonetics system to teach our children how to read.
I was huddled in six jerseys, a scarf, boots, and thermal underwear (yes, I am already freezing cold) in the front of the hall. In retrospect I shouldn’t have sat in the front because it took all my self discipline (of which there really isn’t very much) to not screech with cackling laughter.
The teacher came to the front of the hall, popped on a computer presentation and started to tell us about a free website for Phonics. As she moved through the images on the landing page of the site she said, “When you get to the main page, scroll down to the word, ‘Cock’.”
I have a dirty little mind. I know I do. I am a bit like Beavis and Butthead. I knew that she couldn’t POSSIBLY have said cock. Unless she meant a rooster. But roosters don’t seem to be a massive part of the phonetics curriculum either, so they were out. As were willies.
She carefully scrolled down the screen, painstakingly explaining the way for those parents who didn’t navigate odd little websites on a regular basis. Repeating, far too regularly for my sense of humour, “scroll down to the word, ‘cock’.”
FINALLY we got there. And in big bold letters, along with a picture of two children pointing to a blackboard, was the word, “COP”.
I sniggered dirtily the whole way home. I had to.
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Nov 10, 2010 @ 20:47:58
I also have a filthy mind particularly when reading children books – tonight it was the turn of the wonderful Jeremy Fisher where said frog sat on this lilypad and apparently arranged his fishing tackle – gets me every time! Oh and “”Miffy goes Flying” where her uncle pulls on his gearstick and off they go – he he he
Nov 11, 2010 @ 10:10:17
Ohhhh Vicki! Your comments made me CRY with laughter. I want those books!
Nov 10, 2010 @ 17:27:57
Lol. not sure if i laughed harder at you or the other comments. too funny.
Luschka @ Diary of a First Child recently posted..365-298 to 365-304 A Week In Pictures
Nov 11, 2010 @ 10:10:42
You are so right, Lushka. I had no idea we were all such naughty mums and dads.
Nov 10, 2010 @ 11:39:29
There’s a baby in my post-natal group over here in Scandiland called Simen, pronounces “semen”. I can’t meet the mother’s eyes when I say his name.
Nov 10, 2010 @ 12:46:10
CRY!!! That’s hysterical. Oh, I would faint every time. Your self control is amazing.
Nov 10, 2010 @ 11:27:58
Teachers do have a habit of saying funny things, when I was in school many many years ago, we were in maths, a young girl who was having trouble with her calculator was knocking it on the desk to to try and switch it on, the maths teacher, whos was a bit of a Cock, said ‘Tracy Jones, how would you like it if I banged you against the desk’, being a sad git its one of those things I still laugh about in private.