A steaming pile of doo doo
01 Jun 2011 1 Comment
in Bedraggled Mum, Slightly Insane Tags: Dog, Poo, Rant
I went for a run this evening. The scene was magical. The sun was setting and the sky was streaked with the glorious shades of amber, pink and yellow. The beach was empty and the sea crashed joyously to my left. I was transported, I was a running machine on a natural high.
I was attacked by the stench of dog crap.
I have already formed a deep and abiding hatred of those cretins who seem to lack the singular inability to carry a small plastic bag to pick up their pooch’s poop. How hard can it be? Seriously? I mean, it’s not as if the bag weighs very much. I’ve seen 90-year olds with them.
As my run morphed disturbingly into an angry stomp, I started counting the little red dog shit bins. They are liberally scattered along the beach, the roads, the by-ways and pathways. In fact, for every three doggy doo doo bins there was maybe one normal bin. So it’s not as if the humans who fail to pick up the crap are unable to do so due to horror of carrying the poo for thousands on unhygienic miles. IS IT?
So the only conclusion I have come to is that they are proud. “Look,” they are saying, “Look at my beautiful baby’s steaming turd. Look! It is almost identical to the ones you get in a joke shop.”
They beam with pride. Surely such a masterpiece is too good to scoop?
As my child has now returned home twice with doggy poo on her brand new school shoes I am starting to get more than a little annoyed. There is a spot where I’ve seen the furtive buggers going with their dogs. A spot that is turning (especially now in the warmer weather) into a fertile crop-growing landscape thanks to the abundance of poo fighting for space. You can almost see the old white ones elbowing the fresh ones out of the way and muttering about respect for their elders.
I am seriously tempted to take a day off work and lurk behind the wall, leaping out and crying AHA! whenever somebody’s dog leaves a crap and they leave without paying attention. Although am afraid of being beaten up by pit bull owners, if I am honest.
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Jun 03, 2011 @ 05:16:08
You went for a run, you went for a run ..whoooooooooooooo hoooooooooooooo THAT for me is much more significant than something some inconsiderate human being left behind
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